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| What: | The Well-Mannered War (Missing Adventures novels) |
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| By: | Yumchan, Doncaster, England |
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| Date: | Thursday 12 June 2003 |
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| Rating: |   8 |
Hmm. This book has a reputation for being a very good book. This combined with its low print run has turned it into quite an expensive read.
(Luckily its now available 'free' from http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/doctorwho/ebooks/well_mannered_war/ !)
Frankly, I was a tiny bit disappointed. I was expecting an utter masterpiece. It is still a very good read and I would recommend it thoroughly , but the hype that surrounds it still hasn't really done it any favours.
However it is a very well thought out book. You are never really sure who the real bad guys are and the end was definitely a surprise!
Hopefully Gareth will one day write another book in the BBC Books range. I will definitely try to be at the front of the queue!
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 | Get hooked on the Talons of Weng-Chiang |
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This is probobly the finest of the BBC DVD releases yet.
The story is one of the best and most of Doctor Who's and its setting adds an extra level of mystery around the plot.
With the Doctors Sherlockian deerstalker hat "The Talons" includes many elements of the victorian society and borrows from Jack the Ripper as well as Phantom of the opera, it mixes them well.
The commentary from the director, producer and some of the key actors make the track absorbing. Included is some rough footage of film taking place with directions being given to the actors.
So much extras on top of this wonderfull story as well as the enhanced image and sound make this a must have for all fans of Who.
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| A moving story for the Sixth Doctor |
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| What: | Jubilee (Big Finish: The Monthly Adventures) |
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| By: | David Barton, The English Empire |
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| Date: | Sunday 25 May 2003 |
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| Rating: | 10 |
There is a lot to enjoy about Jubilee. For me my already over the top appreciation for Colin Baker's Sixth Doctor was raised to a new level. The Sixth Doctor and Evelyn are quite frankly the best thing, no better than sliced bread. Robert Shearman's script is amazing, I've been a bit bored of the same sort of re-use of the Daleks but this story uses them in such an innovative way. It is a very touching story with the bit in Episode 3 were Evelyn tells the Doctor how much he means to her is moving, and I felt sadness for the Doctor and even that Daleks plight. One of Big Finish's greatest yet!
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| Hilarious and Thought-Provoking |
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I found Bucher-Jones first New Adventure, The Death of Art, an incomprehensible mush, but thoroughly enjoyed The Taking of Planet Five despite its mind-stretching nature. Much of the faults of the former had to do with the turgid prose style, something thankfully absent from the latter since (Mark Clapham actually wrote that one according to Bucher-Jones' outline).
Ghost Devices is only the second Bernice New Adventure I've read (the rather disappointing Down being the other), and was pleasantly surprised that this one was far better. It's also nowhere near as convoluted as Bucher-Jones' 7th or 8th Doctor novels, and has a liberal dash of humor to boot.
I think one of the main mistake I made while reading The Death of Art was that I read it too quickly. Bucher-Jones' novels should be read slowly, maybe 40-50 pages a day. That's how I paced myself with Ghost Devices, and the experience was much more rewarding than reading in great big chunks of 150 pages a day (a surefire way to get mental indigestion). His novels are filled not only with complex concepts, but are told using complex sentences. Even his action scenes are filled with fascinating explanations and intricate jokes! It is unwise to skim these difficult passages, since they are what the book is about.
The novel comes across as the product of a more knowledgeable Dave Stone or a slightly less loopy Lawrence Miles -- both are authors I enjoy, but they often go too far in their respective realms of nuttiness. Bucher-Jones gives just enough leeway to his plot threads and concepts to keep them interesting and wild, yet keeps them in control enough so they remain comprehensible. Even the cycle of self-negating temporal paradoxes at the end -- which has the potential for a real befuddlement-disaster -- is presented in a way easy to understand.
I must admit that I'm a real sucker for time paradoxes, so the whole premise of this book I found irresistible -- a massive artifact called the Spire that conveys information from the future, whose transmissions are collected and studied by the sentient lizards who have developed an entire culture around it. It is an impressive premise, and was consistently the focus of the book's attention, nicely enhanced by a lengthy side-trip to the homeworld of the race who built the Spire.
The opening page and a half -- with an senile, old, city-sized Factory complaining about the dirty water and subsequently being nuked by the anti-AI drones -- is some of the funniest and intriguing *Who*-related writing I've read. Although it seemed totally irrelevant for most of the book, it's nicely explained on page 190. However, the rest of the Prologue (featuring suicidal businessman Sul Starren), as well as the scene toward the end with a Watchmaker (a.k.a., a Time Lord) painting a door (?) seem totally unconnected to the rest of the novel. These apparently unrelated scenes are my only complaint about what is otherwise a very interesting, funny, and well-written book. Highly recommended.
I'm not a big fan of Orman. Her New Adventures I found to be both silly and
dull (except maybe the first hundred pages of Set Piece), I avoided Vampire
Science like the plague (I hate vampires), but gobbled up the excellent
Seeing I in a single day. So I usually don't go out of my way to read her
books, but after that one good EDA I decided to give this one a shot.
Unnatural History nicely encapsulates all that is bad about Orman's work --
and I suppose that applies to Blum as well. They're great stylists and the
actual prose reads wonderfully. But the plot is silly -- a victory of style
over substance -- laden with adolescent-level seriousness and inane
angst-ridden philosophizing. All the characters run around like mad
teenagers while trying to decide whether to shag or not (in accordance with
their likewise teenage-level hormones), the Doctor/TARDIS get horribly
tortured and mutilated, and characters from previous Orman books pop up
making the reader stop cold and utter "Huh? Who? What?" Why does she expect
us to remember stupid characters from her previous books?! Ah well, it's not
like we're missing anything. The only one I actually do remember is that
stubborn receptionist from the beginning of Seeing I...
So how fares the plot of Unnatural History? More space- and time-tearing
shenanigans in San Francisco. Ho-hum... I didn't even like this plot the
first time round, in that atrocious TV movie. Remember that? I sure wish I
didn't, and that Orman & Blum would quit reminding us. And they're really
not doing themselves any good by emulating it. The only time paradox story
set in San Francisco I'd ever want a repeat viewing of is Star Trek IV, and
considering my opinions on that particular franchise that's really saying
something.
And for the second time in a row, the TARDIS is nearly destroyed. This sort
of thing is exciting, but only when it *doesn't* happen every other day. It
was a big mistake to put this novel and Dominion right next to each other.
And the brief, out-of-the-blue solution to the hitherto insoluble
dimensional scar problem left me blinking my eyes with little *bink-bink*
noises, like Dee-Dee from *Dexter's Laboratory*.
And there's an incredibly stupid and insulting scene on page 156 where the
Doctor buys a bottle of beer and pours it out onto the ground in memory of a
friend who recently died. Doctor in da hood! "This is for my homies who got
da cap in da head..." I can't believe they actually wrote this scene, and
even more unbelievable is that it made it through the editing stages.
However bad the story and characters may be, there are several really good
jokes. Highlights include the Doctor shouting "Sam, number fifteen!" and
staggering across the alley to provide a distraction (p. 48), Fitz's
thinking about "ley lines" (p. 61), and the Doctor taunting the Faction
Paradox kid (p. 166).
Ah yes. Faction Paradox. I love these guys from Miles' books, but here
they're reduced to a group of trick-or-treaters, or creepy in-bred retards
from the backwoods of West Virginia, right out of a bad Lovecraft story. But
I must say the whole biodata concept was better explained here than in any
of Miles' books, and having strands of it lying around San Francisco was
interesting and nicely used. The temporal duplication machine that runs on
its own Blinovitch cancellation energy was quite clever and I enjoyed that.
And I thought the Doctor's biodata being inconsistent and self-contradictory
was a nice touch, emphasizing that time travellers suffer unusual
side-effects.
This book explains (in part) the whole "Dark Sam" business that was hinted
at in Alien Bodies and carried on in Interference, but it was annoying to
have to wade through this ghastly book just for those bits. And even so,
they weren't very good.
I never cease to be amazed by the obligatory massive acknowledgements
page(s) in these *Who* novels. I counted no fewer than FORTY people
mentioned in this one! I don't even *know* that many people! Much less
people whom I could sucker into helping out with my book... (It's like one
of these effects-laden movies, where the ending credits mention even the tea
lady who came in to substitute for Sally -- who had the flu -- for one
afternoon of filming.) And yet, with all this help and feedback, the book is
still crappy! You'd think one of these people would speak up and say "Ah...
you know, Kate, there are a couple hundred pages here that could use a
little more work..." Apparently not. They're either sycophants or idiots
themselves. What a waste.
Save yourselves the time, money, and effort by reading Cameron Dixon's
synopsis at http://www.drwhoguide.com/whobbc23.htm. The only outstanding
thing about this novel is the really nice cover. But remember: you don't
have to pay money to look at it!
| What: | Reckless Engineering (BBC Eighth Doctor novels) |
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| By: | John Ellison, Atlanta, Georgia, USA |
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| Date: | Monday 12 May 2003 |
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| Rating: | 9 |
Its humble beginnings seem to mark the book as mediocre. But then...at some point...it picks up speed and rumbles to a resounding finish that is truly unforgetable.
Walters orchestrates a tale driven by characters. Like several of the previous authors, he manages to *really* find the voices of Anji, Fitz and the Doctor. He drops them into a world of vivid horror (only a twisted mind could create the Wildren) and their reactions form the foundation for the rest of the story.
It is also evident that Walters has done his homework, tossing in tidbits from the novel line continuity. What more could a fan ask for in a book? Well gut wrenching moral dilemma comes to mind and Walters delivers there as well. The slow start prevents my rating it a 10 but even then it will stay with me for a very long time...
A must read!
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| Easily the Worst Novel I've Ever Read |
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I'm one of those people who keeps every single book he ever buys, even the
ones I didn't like. My shelf space is very limited, so many books reside in
boxes, though carefully preserved and taken out now and again to "cycle"
them with ones on the shelf, or reread them. I enjoy almost all of what I
read and seem to have less exacting standards for fiction than most people.
I'm very forgiving of authors for their peculiarities and faults, and
effortlessly enjoy what is despised by the more-critical majority.
It should come as a great surprise to everyone, then, that I absolutely
loathe Damaged Goods. More than loathe -- there are no words to describe how
much revulsion on a mental and spiritual level this novel aroused. It's by
far the worst novel I've ever read, and this is coming from someone who's
read thousands. I read it about five years ago -- it's taken me that long to
cool down enough to write this more level-headed review.
At first this book struck me as ridiculous if nothing else. But around page
100, when it became clear that things were not beginning to brighten, it
passed the RIDICULOUS point and became MONOTONOUS. By page 150 it had
reached the THIS AUTHOR IS OBVIOUSLY DEEPLY DISTURBED point. By page 200 I
was literally gagging and sick at heart.
What, you may ask, provoked this response? Page after page after page of
carefully and lovingly described death and devastation, torment and rage,
mutilation and horror, pain and suffering, perversion and manipulation -- on
and on and on and on and on. Nothing else. All the characters were the
lowest, basest dregs of humanity, doing the worst imaginable things to each
other and to themselves. No love, no hope, no joy -- only suffering and
death.
I love gratuitous violence as much as the next man, but honestly! This
(so-called) novel is nothing *but* gratuitous violence. For instance there
is one scene where a woman murders her husband in an excessively grisly
fashion, for no better reason than the dead infant inside her womb "told her
to." That's what I *think* happened, anyway; Davies didn't seem too keen to
let the readers know what was going on, beyond drenching us in blood. If
you're going to have your characters run amuck, at least provide a credible
explanation.
Presenting violence and its consequences realistically is one thing, but
this is wallowing in it, loving it, and holding it up as a wonderful
experience. Never before have I encountered such an attitude taken to the
extremes presented here. No matter what his stated rationale may be, the
author (I hate to say it) is apparently a very sick individual, who adores
and glorifies blood and pain, wrapping himself up in a warm blanket of hate
and death. Absolutely sickening.
This book is also unoriginal and dull, arising, no doubt, from the
repetition of the above-mentioned mayhem. And the few variations of
horrifying death presented are nothing new: there are all sorts of automated
killer machines from ancient Gallifrey (yawn) rearing their ugly
cross-dimensional heads by erupting from the bodies of various cocaine
addicts (gag, yawn) taking possession of people to function as operators
(yawn) and devastating much of London after the joining between mad-woman
and machine exponentially increases the savagery of each (yawn). All of this
happens without anyone noticing, apparently. Thousands die, and yet somehow
by the end of the book it's all fobbed off as "well, just a typical day in
the shadier districts of London." It makes UNIT's emergency evacuation of
London in Invasion of the Dinosaurs seem believable by comparison.
I was determined to finish reading this novel, and I did. I then promptly
tore it in half, then into tiny bits, and threw it into the garbage where it
obviously originated. This is the only novel I have ever intentionally
mistreated, damaged, or thrown away, and it deserved it. Ptui.
Is anyone sick of Sabbath yet? I am beginning to wonder if we will ever get a break from him. Don't get me wrong, he's a good character, reminiscent of the Master himself, but he is getting old and tired. Give the Doctor some new enemies or maybe bring someone along who is part of his past that can help him with his amnesia.
As far as the story of the book, it was pretty slow at first and didn't really pick up until around page 200. It wasn't as action packed as the books have been lately and it left me rushing through the book to just get it over with.
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| The First 'Missing Adventure' Book? |
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A book, notorious for its poor bindings but also for having the best Dr Who cover artwork (and also excellent artwork throughout, although the Tardis does look like a Blue Peter shoebox job!)
The Doctor had been travelling on his own here, (And implies that he has been on his own for sometime), until just before the book starts. He had materialised in the Great Fire of London and picked up a family of fleeing 'peasants', the Mortimers who think he is the devil or a Magician in his magic box. The Doctor finds them annoying and spends a fair amount of time putting them down! (Though he is ashamed of this a couple of times.)
The Doctor says that he will probably be able to pop them back in England, but at which time he knows not. However he loses control of the Tardis and ends up on an artificial planet with a good view of the Great Spiral Nebula in the Andromeda constellation. They are met by the Aalan race who are, not surprisingly, an Aryan type people who want to take over the Milky Way galaxy! Their leader calls himself 'The One' and is both mentally and technologically more advanced than the Doctor. The One hasn't seen 'Man' for quite some time (100,000,000 years ish) and is quite interested in the Doctor and the Mortimors for information on the Milky Way galaxy.
A 40 page illustrated text story which is actually quite a good read, although, the author, does seem to, get a little, carried away with commas!
"They were all taking it very well, Dr Who decided, considering where they had come from and the way in which they had trapped themselves into what must be, to their simple minds, the most fantastic nightmare that ever the mind of a man had suffered." Was the opening sentence.
William Hartnell is definitely the Doctor in this story with his occasionally grumpy mannerisms but the Mortimers don't get fleshed out too much.
Definitely worth looking through and reading if you get the chance.
| What: | The English Way of Death (Missing Adventures novels) |
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| By: | Yumchan, Doncaster, England |
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| Date: | Thursday 24 April 2003 |
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| Rating: | 8 |
I read this straight after reading The Romance Of Crime which I had really enjoyed.
It begins with a good prologue, but then I felt that the first 'episode' seemed to drop off a little. Luckely though the book picked up after this, but not to the same level as The Romance Of Crime. The Doctor in this book doesn't seem quite as Tom Bakery as in R.of C. and the plot isn't as focused. However I found Romana to be exceptionally well portrayed here.
This is still another good book from Gareth Roberts with plenty of nice humourous touches along the way and well worth reading.
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| Nocturnal Habits Of The Ogrons. |
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| What: | The Romance of Crime (Missing Adventures novels) |
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| By: | Yumchan, Doncaster, England |
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| Date: | Thursday 24 April 2003 |
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| Rating: | 10 |
A book with Ogrons on the cover would probably not usually be my first choice for good read. But Gareth Roberts has taken a very dull and uninspiring old foe and turned them into a very interesting and occasionally comical race here!
Tom Baker IS the Doctor in this book and you can imagine him saying all his lines with ease. All the other characters come to life on the page too.
A superb first Missing Adventure for Mr Roberts, well worth searching out on ebay.
| What: | The Gallifrey Chronicles (Miscellaneous factual books) |
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| By: | Kevin Cherry, Maryland, USA |
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| Date: | Tuesday 22 April 2003 |
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| Rating: | 10 |
I give this book 10 out of 10 stars. Every new Who fan needs this book, as well as us old fogies. John has written an excellent book, with lots of great info. Go out and buy this book today, you won't regret it.
| What: | Lungbarrow (New Adventures novels) |
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| By: | Yumchan, Doncaster, England |
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| Date: | Tuesday 22 April 2003 |
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| Rating: | 9 |
Available Now From Kazaa!
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| A Bizarre Series Of Events.. |
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| What: | The Plotters (Missing Adventures novels) |
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| By: | Yumchan, Doncaster, England |
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| Date: | Tuesday 22 April 2003 |
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| Rating: | 10 |
..led me to read this book, which I won't go into here. However, this book had been staring at me from a shelf where I was staying in Japan. For over 6 months I passed it by, mainly because it was a Hartnell and also because it was a Harnell period story. (Possibly also because I was far from enthralled by the Timewyrm and Cat's Cradle books and stopped reading Dr Who.)
It was during a particularly nasty typhoon that I finally picked it up to read, and, after that I honestly had trouble putting it down.
Don't let the image of a 'Hartnell period story' put you off. I have since read Gareth Roberts' other Missing Adventures and this one stands up just as well.
The characters are all true to form but filled out much more than on screen and the story just flows.
Brilliant book, get it from ebay while its still cheap!
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| 2nd Doctor takes care of business |
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This is another great title. Glad it is no longer lost. The Cybermen are my 2nd favorite menace in the Doctor Who universe. Partick Troughton excels as the Doctor. Bring on more 2nd Doctor to DVD.
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| An awesome intro to the 7th Doctor |
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From the opening title sequence and that great theme song this DVD does not let up. I love the story with Daleks fighting Daleks and the men who try to appease them. This was my first experience with Sylvester McCoy as the Doctor and I was not disappointed. I hope more from this era is released on DVD.
| What: | Timelash (BBC classic series videos) |
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| By: | Otherworld Sin, Somewhere... else... *enigmatic grin* |
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| Date: | Thursday 10 April 2003 |
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| Rating: | 8 |
Utter crap if you view it as a serious story. Just as well I never take things seriously, then!
Honestly, most of the cast bites. Full stop. Vena... shoot the woman. Tekker? Bolt-3. The rebels? Hm, Ultima should take them out quite nicely. However, just to save my sanity...
Colin Baker is wonderful, considering the loooooooowwwwww quality of the lines he's given. It's nice to see Nicola fall victim to what my mother dubbed "Screaming Companion Syndrome." I love my mum. And of course, David Chandler as Herbert. Funny! Cute! Great lines! Excellent actor!
I could have shot down this story, but I'm not going to. Why?
Because of Herbert. *giggle blush*
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| I can see why the series died.... |
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| What: | Paradise Towers (BBC classic series videos) |
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| By: | DW, Bethalto, Illinois, USA |
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| Date: | Wednesday 9 April 2003 |
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| Rating: | 3 |
I own about 75-100 of the Doctor Who videos and this is one of the worst epsiodes of Doctor Who I've ever seen. The only one worse to this point is "Delta & the Bannermen". Why couldn't they keep making great Doctor Who episodes like "Genesis of the Daleks". These 7th Doctor episodes are just plain stupid. They seem to almost be making fun of Doctor Who. This episode, and Delta seem like parodies of Doctor Who. Anyway, I would advise you, unless you are a collector, to steer clear of this one, although as bad as it is, it's still much better than "Delta & the Bannermen".
If someone were to novelize the Academy Awards, and throw in a few caricatures of various "Doctor Who" characters, it would resemble this, the sickeningly self-congratulatory 50th New Adventure by Paul Cornell.
The plot -- what little there is of it, which is surprising since it goes on for about 250 pages -- involves Bernice's marriage to Jason Kane. But what it actually consists of is people running around, spouting inane chatter, shagging, and quoting pop songs in a tongue-in-cheek fashion which, I suppose, is meant to show how terribly clever the author is. There's also an immodest amount of cloning and infidelity, as well as a really stupid song. And I won't even bother critiquing Cornell's characterization of the Master, who pops up briefly merely to annoy people.
As much as I like the cover -- featuring, as it does, over a dozen characters from previous novels, along with a handy-dandy profile drawing on the inside cover showing who is who -- this book is an absolute, unmitigated disaster, and Cornell should be ashamed of himself for writing it, and the series' editor should be ashamed for having compounded the author's folly by actually publishing the dratted thing.
And what gets me is, after all the to-do of getting Bernice married and having a happy ending, the series' writers go off and have her divorce Jason just a few books later. "Happy Endings" indeed...
It was a good idea to have the cybermen back for the Silver anniversary. But the cybermen seemed to be a little too much like Cannon Fodder, Being destroyed rather too easily Still it was good to see them back again. The extended video versions scenes do help flesh the story out a bit more
